The Toad Looking Poojeeta
May 26, 2024

Imagine being so self-deluded, that after years of catfishing, you feel confident enough to post barefaced and unedited photos of yourself online. This wild barefooted domesticated female Tarzan, Indu, didn’t realize that she actually ruined her catfish game. This domesticated poojeeta has a natural purple-hued lip akin to a person suffering from cyanosis. Our wild and jungly-looking poojeeta here looks like she hasn’t showered in […]

Hindu Avatar Creation Tool Explained
December 21, 2022

Some people may have a hard time understanding Hindu lore. Trust me; it’s confusing as fuck! One of the confusing aspects of Hinduism (also known as Dinduism or Dindunothingeverism) is the whole avatar system in Hinduism. I’ve listened to many explanations, and honestly, none of them make any sense. A 5-year-old can develop a more […]

An Analysis of the Gypsy Benihana
December 19, 2022

I may have a few screws loose. Otherwise, I would not be this intensely focused on the oddities of this song and its music video. From the title, lyrics, and gypsy artists, it all comes off as odd. It’s as bizarre as seeing a Chinese man with a black woman. You just can’t get over […]

Will Smith’s Questionable Hissy Fit
March 28, 2022

Will Smith, a well-known cuck in the elite circle of people who enjoy a certain kind of pizza, had a little hissy fit at some pointless award show. This whole kerfuffle might be fake, as usual with most things in the entertainment industry. However, in the rare event it is real, let’s dive deep into […]

Ukraine Is About to Build Mud-Huts
March 14, 2022

Despite the countless sanctions and invasions on Muslim land, people like to think of Muslims as mud-hut dwellers, sand naggers, and camel jockeys. You know the typical nonsense about how Muslim countries aren’t developed or uncivilized. Oddly enough, with all this criticism, non-Muslims to this day do not wash their assholes after taking a shit. […]

My Childhood Accident
March 7, 2022

When I was a little boy, I loved surfing by the lake behind our house.  It was a small lake, but I had lots of fun surfing on it.  I remember one day I decided to take my surfboard to the lake.  My mother had warned me about surfing in the lake due to the […]

Becky the Dog Mom’s Sternocleidomastoid
October 1, 2020

Aiight, peep this the fuck out… Becky Smith, a 20-year-old vegan, self-proclaimed civil rights leader, hashtag activist, vegan, soy milk latte connoisseur, and dog mommy. Becky attended a hashtag rally with her skinny white boyfriend and her skinny black boyfriend (liberal cucks, am I right?). They all wore matching shirts that said, “My vagina My […]

Disney, BLM, and Will Smith Committing Heinous Acts of Cultural Appropriation
April 10, 2019

Dear whites, LGBTQRSTV, feminists, vegans, dog moms, Black Lives Matter, or any other Generation Z snowflakes, I am writing this letter demanding an apology for this blatant cultural appropriation and bringing awareness of today’s societal hypocrisy. Will Smith is a nazi, KKK, sexist, homophobic, Trump-supporting bigot! ANTIFA! ANTIFA! ANTIFA! Sorry, I’m just trying to sound […]

F.A.S.T. Global Marketing – The Illuminati’s Shit Pyramid
December 12, 2018

Back around June of 2017, my contract was coming to an end with my current employer at the time. I was applying everywhere, swiping left and right. Shit, I made a LinkedIn account to apply for some positions listed on there. I was looking at regular office desk jobs. That’s when I came across “F.A.S.T. […]

Risking the Sanctity of My Anal Passage Over Some Diapers
September 28, 2018

I tried to buy some diapers for my son off of someone on OfferUp because shitting isn’t cheap.  Well, glad I didn’t go through with the sale because I too, would have been hashtagging “metoo.”