Were the Intentions Behind Salmacis’ Prayer Filled With Love or Hate?
April 24, 2018

You’re driving in your hooptee with some fine-ass Puerto Rican mami sitting in the front passenger seat.  She’s your friend Pacito’s sister, Clarita.  Just like her name, the bitch’s intentions of being a dick tease and a hoe were pretty clear as soon as you saw her.  Clarita is wearing a dress she saw some […]

Summer Lesson – Allison-Chan, Can I Sniff and Peek?
June 28, 2017

The game we were all waiting for should have been Sony’s major announcement at E3. Except they tried to appeal to the western baijo bakas and decided not to show this and instead showed a bearded man with an axe killing shit. No, Sony, we needed this to be displayed. The west obviously needs to […]

Pikachu Is Ash Ketchum’s Dad
June 23, 2017

Update: Warner Bros. Pictures and Toho totally checked this site out and ripped off my theory and turned it into Detective Pikachu. Fuck you guys, I want my schmeckels! Keep in mind Pokemon came out in the nineties, back when fathers were still around in their kids’ lives, and Amber Rose didn’t exist. So indeed, […]

Starlink – Battle for Atlas, Kill Yourself if You Buy This
June 13, 2017

So instead of explaining why this is a shitty game, I’ll just set out a scenario for you instead. John is a 35-year-old twat that spends most of his time on 4chan and Reddit. He lives with his single mother, part of the Odobenus genus, and receives an SSI income. However, as of recent, he […]

How to Hook Up With IG Thots Using LinkedIn
March 7, 2017

Mi wi teach yuh ow to hook up wid women using LinkedIn fi get tha pum-pum. Hell yuh might even be able fi guh daggering wid yuh new pum pum companion. Dis magic take sum effort but di end result worth it, but kip inna mind dis a nuh fi find dat boonoonoonoos. Nuh be […]

Corey M. Might Be the Biggest Sonic Fan
February 17, 2017

This is Corey M., a fuckwad that likes beating his meat to animal porn. No, not your traditional bestiality porn, where a woman with significant daddy issues has said “fuck it” to life and decided to have sex with a dog. I’m talking about that furry porn. That Sonic the Hedgehog and Tails donkey-dick debauchery. […]

Safeway Cake
February 7, 2017

Carl Smith was doing ten years in prison because he had horrible parents. His father was a drunk and abusive twat who proudly wore his stained wife-beater shirt. His mother was also a drunkard idiot; however, she was the submissive drunk. She would inject herself with the “make-me-feel-good medicine” while watching the Maury show. Naturally, […]