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Will Smith’s Questionable Hissy Fit
March 28, 2022

Will Smith, a well-known cuck in the elite circle of people who enjoy a certain kind of pizza, had a little hissy fit at some pointless award show. This whole kerfuffle might be fake, as usual with most things in the entertainment industry. However, in the rare event it is real, let’s dive deep into […]

Ukraine Is About to Build Mud-Huts
March 14, 2022

Despite the countless sanctions and invasions on Muslim land, people like to think of Muslims as mud-hut dwellers, sand naggers, and camel jockeys. You know the typical nonsense about how Muslim countries aren’t developed or uncivilized. Oddly enough, with all this criticism, non-Muslims to this day do not wash their assholes after taking a shit. […]

Becky the Dog Mom’s Sternocleidomastoid
October 1, 2020

Aiight, peep this the fuck out… Becky Smith, a 20-year-old vegan, self-proclaimed civil rights leader, hashtag activist, vegan, soy milk latte connoisseur, and dog mommy. Becky attended a hashtag rally with her skinny white boyfriend and her skinny black boyfriend (liberal cucks, am I right?). They all wore matching shirts that said, “My vagina My […]

Disney, BLM, and Will Smith Committing Heinous Acts of Cultural Appropriation
April 10, 2019

Dear whites, LGBTQRSTV, feminists, vegans, dog moms, Black Lives Matter, or any other Generation Z snowflakes, I am writing this letter demanding an apology for this blatant cultural appropriation and bringing awareness of today’s societal hypocrisy. Will Smith is a nazi, KKK, sexist, homophobic, Trump-supporting bigot! ANTIFA! ANTIFA! ANTIFA! Sorry, I’m just trying to sound […]

F.A.S.T. Global Marketing – The Illuminati’s Shit Pyramid
December 12, 2018

Back around June of 2017, my contract was coming to an end with my current employer at the time. I was applying everywhere, swiping left and right. Shit, I made a LinkedIn account to apply for some positions listed on there. I was looking at regular office desk jobs. That’s when I came across “F.A.S.T. […]

Risking the Sanctity of My Anal Passage Over Some Diapers
September 28, 2018

I tried to buy some diapers for my son off of someone on OfferUp because shitting isn’t cheap.  Well, glad I didn’t go through with the sale because I too, would have been hashtagging “metoo.”

Starbucks’ Afrika Bambaataa-esque Bamboozleness
September 20, 2018

My money, my rights! If you Khazarian wizards can’t make good coffee or scones, I will take back that schmeckel. Yahoodi’s better have my schmeckels!

Were the Intentions Behind Salmacis’ Prayer Filled With Love or Hate?
April 24, 2018

You’re driving in your hooptee with some fine-ass Puerto Rican mami sitting in the front passenger seat.  She’s your friend Pacito’s sister, Clarita.  Just like her name, the bitch’s intentions of being a dick tease and a hoe were pretty clear as soon as you saw her.  Clarita is wearing a dress she saw some […]

Summer Lesson – Allison-Chan, Can I Sniff and Peek?
June 28, 2017

The game we were all waiting for should have been Sony’s major announcement at E3. Except they tried to appeal to the western baijo bakas and decided not to show this and instead showed a bearded man with an axe killing shit. No, Sony, we needed this to be displayed. The west obviously needs to […]

Pikachu Is Ash Ketchum’s Dad
June 23, 2017

Update: Warner Bros. Pictures and Toho totally checked this site out and ripped off my theory and turned it into Detective Pikachu. Fuck you guys, I want my schmeckels! Keep in mind Pokemon came out in the nineties, back when fathers were still around in their kids’ lives, and Amber Rose didn’t exist. So indeed, […]